survivors,
this is your space.
I wish you didn’t have to be here. But here we are.
As a survivor writing this from the other side of the internet, know that I see you.
Sometimes it’s not that anyone tells us to “move on”—it’s that the world moves too quickly around us. What we really need is space to move through it.
Take Back Trust for Survivors was created for that space. For the people navigating their healthcare, their healing, and the pieces of themselves that don’t fit neatly into a follow-up visit or a form. Here, you’ll find clear, trauma-informed guidance and gentle reminders that your care still matters—and so do you.
If you’ve just experienced sexual assault…
If this just happened, take a breath.
You don’t have to make every decision right now. You just need to know what your options are—
and that you still have them.
None of the paths below are the “right” one for everyone. What matters most is your comfort, your safety, and your control.
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If you’re in danger or need medical help right now, it’s okay to call 911 or go to the nearest emergency department.
You deserve safety and care, no matter what happened or how long it’s been.If you’re safe but don’t know what to do next, you can reach out to RAINN’s 24-hour hotline (1-800-656-4673). The advocates who answer are trained to listen, believe you, and help you find a nearby hospital, clinic, or support program that understands what you’re going through. You don’t have to figure this out alone.
You can also go to an emergency department, urgent care, or clinic for medical care. If possible, ask whether they have a SANE (Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner) on staff. These clinicians are specially trained to provide trauma-informed care and, if you choose, to collect evidence through a rape kit.
You can say:
“I was assaulted and I’d like to see a SANE nurse or someone trained in sexual-assault care.”
If you think you might want an exam later, try—if you can—not to shower, change clothes, eat, or brush your teeth yet. Those actions can sometimes remove evidence. But if you’ve already done any of them, please know this: you can still get care.
You can still be examined. You can still be believed.
Evidence may still be collected, and your need for treatment and compassion never depends on what you did or didn’t do after the assault. -
You don’t have to decide about reporting right away. You can receive care and still take time to think about what’s best for you.
If you’re considering preserving evidence but not ready to report, some states allow anonymous or delayed rape kits, which means your name isn’t attached and you can decide later whether to file. -
If you’ve experienced assault, you still have options for protecting your health.
Hospitals, urgent care centers, and clinics can provide emergency contraception (like Plan B, Ella, or the copper IUD) and preventive medications to reduce the risk of STIs or HIV. These are most effective if started quickly—ideally within 72 hours.
You don’t have to go to a hospital to take action right away. Plan B is available over the counter without a prescription at most pharmacies, major retailers, and some college health centers. Ella and the copper IUD require a prescription or visit, but telehealth options can often help with same-day access.
Even if you’re already on birth control, taking emergency contraception is often recommended, just in case medication timing or absorption was affected.
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You still have options.
You can reach out to RAINN (1-800-656-4673) for confidential guidance and help finding a survivor-centered clinic nearby. Some community health centers and Planned Parenthood locations also provide confidential post-assault care without requiring police involvement. -
You don’t have to go through this alone.
RAINN National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673 (24/7, confidential)
VictimConnect: 1-855-484-2846 (text or call)
Trans Lifeline: 1-877-565-8860
Trauma-Informed Healthcare, Explained
Trauma-informed care isn’t a special kind of medicine—
it’s a way of approaching care that understands how trauma can shape a person’s health, reactions, and needs.
It centers your safety, choice, and control.
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Trauma-informed care means your provider recognizes that trauma is common and can affect how you experience your body, pain, and medical care.
It’s about creating an environment where you feel safe, respected, and in control—no matter what your history is.A trauma-informed provider will:
Ask before they touch you and explain what they’re doing.
Give you choices during your exam.
Check in about how you’re feeling.
Welcome support people if you want someone in the room.
Respect boundaries without judgment or frustration.
If you’ve ever felt unseen, rushed, or dismissed in a medical setting, trauma-informed care is what should have happened instead.
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You don’t need a script to deserve compassion—but sometimes having the words helps.
Here are a few ways to open the conversation:“I have a history of trauma, and I do best when people tell me what they’re going to do before they do it.”
“Can we take things slowly today? I might need breaks during the exam.”
“It helps me to have someone in the room. Is that okay?”
“I’d like trauma-informed care. Can you tell me what that looks like in this clinic?”
If you’re not ready to share details, you don’t have to. You can keep it simple:
“I have some medical anxiety and I’d like to go step by step.”
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When you schedule your appointment, it’s okay to ask:
“Do any of your providers offer trauma-informed or survivor-centered care?”
You can also ask what that looks like in practice—how exams are explained, whether support people are allowed, and if you’ll be able to pause or decline parts of a visit. Their response will tell you a lot.
Once you’re there, trust what your body tells you in the first few minutes.
Trauma-informed providers make eye contact, listen without interrupting, and never rush you through your story—or your silence. They explain procedures before starting and ask permission before touching you.Red flags might include:
Dismissive or minimizing responses (“You’re fine,” “This will just take a second”).
Ignoring your boundaries or requests for breaks.
Making you feel pressured, judged, or unsafe.
If you notice any of these, you’re allowed to stop the visit, ask for someone else, or leave. You deserve care that makes you feel safe, not small.
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If you need ongoing care or don’t feel safe returning to your current provider, you can look for clinics or organizations that explicitly mention trauma-informed or survivor-centered care.
Start with:RAINN’s provider directory
Planned Parenthood (many centers have trauma-informed clinicians)
The National Sexual Violence Resource Center (NSVRC)
You can also ask when scheduling:
“Do you have providers who offer trauma-informed or sexual-assault–trained care?”
Your safety, comfort, and control are part of your treatment—not separate from it.
Healing on Your Terms
Healing is not linear.
It’s not a checklist, a finish line, or a single moment where you suddenly feel “better.”
It’s the space between surviving and rebuilding—
the quiet days when you feel okay, and the harder ones when you don’t.
You don’t move backward when you struggle. You’re still healing.
You don’t fail when you need rest. You’re still healing.
You don’t need to be “over it.” You just need to keep choosing yourself, one day at a time.
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Healing isn’t about “getting over it.” It’s about learning to move through it in your own time, in your own way.
Some days you might feel strong and grounded. Other days, it might feel like it all just happened again. Both are part of the process.Healing can look like:
Scheduling your first check-up after months of avoidance.
Saying “no” during an exam when something doesn’t feel right.
Sleeping through the night for the first time in a while.
Talking to someone you trust—or choosing not to talk yet.
You don’t need to prove your healing to anyone. You’re already doing it by surviving.
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Everyone’s body reacts differently after trauma. You might notice pain, soreness, spotting, or pelvic discomfort. Hormonal shifts, stress, and disrupted sleep can affect your cycle, digestion, or energy levels in ways that feel unfamiliar or unpredictable.
For some people, physical sensations show up right away. For others, they surface later—tightness in your chest, tension in your jaw or pelvis, nausea, headaches, exhaustion, or a general sense that your body doesn’t quite feel like your own. These sensations are your body’s way of holding the experience—of trying to find safety again.
Trauma lives not just in the mind, but in the body. When something overwhelming happens, the nervous system floods with stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol. Your muscles tense to protect you; your digestion can slow down; your heart rate and breathing may stay on high alert. Even after the immediate danger has passed, your body can stay in that protective state—long after you want it to.
That’s why you might feel physically drained or “off” even when you think you should be okay. It’s not weakness or overreaction—it’s your body’s alarm system doing its job a little too well. Over time, gentle movement, rest, nutrition, therapy, and touch that feels safe can help your system reset.
Reconnection takes time. The goal isn’t to erase what happened—it’s to remind your body that it’s safe to come home again.
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There’s no single way to share something as deeply personal as sexual trauma. The right time, words, and details are different for everyone—and there’s no rule that says you have to tell anyone at all. You get to decide if, when, and how to share.
For many survivors, the idea of disclosure can bring up a mix of fear and relief: fear of not being believed, or of changing how someone sees you; relief at the thought of not holding it alone anymore. Both can exist at the same time.
When you do choose to tell a partner, it doesn’t have to be a full story. It can be as simple as sharing that something happened and that it affects how you experience closeness, touch, or trust. What matters most is that you’re heard and met with care.
A compassionate partner will listen without trying to fix it. They’ll let you set the pace, ask what feels safe, and check in before initiating physical intimacy. They’ll understand that healing isn’t linear—that feeling safe one day and uneasy the next doesn’t mean you’re back at the beginning.
Sometimes survivors worry that sharing will make intimacy harder. In reality, open communication often creates more safety, not less. When a partner knows how trauma might show up—through hesitation, tension, or withdrawal—they can respond with gentleness rather than confusion or hurt. That understanding can transform intimacy into a space of healing rather than fear.
If someone responds with frustration, disbelief, or pressure, that’s not a reflection of your worth—it’s a reflection of their limitations. You deserve to be in relationships where your boundaries are met with respect, not resistance.
Relearning intimacy after trauma can take time. It can involve exploring touch that feels safe again—like holding hands, hugging, or resting near someone without expectation. It can also mean redefining what pleasure looks like for you, separating it from performance or obligation.
You are allowed to take your time. You are allowed to stop. You are allowed to feel joy again when you’re ready.
Healthy intimacy after trauma isn’t about returning to who you were before—it’s about discovering new ways to feel safe, connected, and whole. -
Reconnection takes time. It doesn’t mean forcing yourself into comfort or pretending you’re okay—it means slowly reminding your body that it’s allowed to feel again.
Gentle reconnection might look like:
Taking slow, intentional showers and noticing how the water feels on your skin.
Stretching, walking, or breathing deeply without any goal of “fitness” or appearance.
Journaling about what your body does for you—carry you, protect you, heal you—instead of how it looks.
Touching your hand, arm, or heart and simply acknowledging, “I’m here.”
Therapy can help rebuild that connection, and its an incredibly valuable tool.
And if talking about what happened feels impossible, thats okay. There are evidence-based treatments—like Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR), Somatic Experiencing, or Sensorimotor Psychotherapy—that don’t require retelling your story in detail. These approaches help your brain and body process trauma safely, working through the physical responses (like panic, numbness, or hypervigilance).
Maybe you want to talk it out. Maybe you don’t. You don’t have to do any of it before you want to - but keep in mind that you may never truly feel “ready.”
You can start by simply acknowledging the truth that your body has been through something—and it’s still here. Still protecting you. Still yours.You don’t have to love your body right now. You just have to give it a chance to feel safe again.
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Finding the right therapist can take time—and you deserve one who understands trauma and believes survivors.
When reaching out, you can ask:“Do you have experience working with sexual trauma or PTSD?”
“How do you make your sessions trauma-informed?”
“Can I bring a support person or check in about boundaries during sessions?”Resources that can help:
RAINN’s National Therapist Directory
Psychology Today’s Trauma-Focused Therapist Finder (use filters for “sexual assault,” “trauma/PTSD,” or “somatic therapy”)
If therapy isn’t accessible or feels too intense right now, online support groups, peer-led communities, or journaling can also be part of healing. There’s no wrong way to start.
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Flashbacks and panic aren’t signs that you’re broken—they’re signs that your body remembers.
When you’ve experienced trauma, your nervous system learns to stay alert for danger. Sometimes, something as small as a tone of voice, the sound of latex gloves, or even a shift in lighting can trigger that memory—not as a thought, but as a feeling.Flashbacks aren’t always visual. They can feel like tightness in your chest, dizziness, numbness, a rush of heat, or the sudden need to escape. Panic is your body’s way of saying, “I don’t feel safe right now.” It’s not a weakness—it’s your body trying to protect you, even when you’re not in danger anymore.
If this happens during a medical visit, you can pause at any point. You don’t have to explain why. You might take a few deep breaths, ask for the provider to stop for a moment, or focus your eyes on something still in the room to remind yourself of where you are and that you’re safe now.
Simple grounding techniques can help bring you back to the present:Name five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste or sense.
Keep one foot on the floor, or hold something that connects you to the present—a piece of jewelry, a scarf, your phone, or even the chair beneath you.
Breathe slowly through your nose and out your mouth, lengthening each exhale.
If panic or flashbacks happen during intimacy, it can be especially disorienting. You might feel shame, frustration, or confusion about why your body seems to “react” without your consent. Please know that this is not your fault. Your body is responding to an old threat, not the person in front of you.
If you have a partner you trust, you can let them know what helps you feel safe—like checking in before physical touch, using a signal if you need a break, or keeping the lights on. Healthy intimacy is about collaboration, not performance. The right partner will meet you with care, not defensiveness.
Over time, working with a trauma-informed therapist or somatic practitioner can help your body relearn safety. Treatments like EMDR, Somatic Experiencing, or trauma-focused CBT can help you process the physical and emotional responses tied to trauma without forcing you to relive what happened.
Healing from trauma doesn’t mean you’ll never have a flashback again. It means that when they come, you have tools, support, and self-compassion to guide you back to yourself.
We’ve built a whole section of Take Back Trust called Your Questions, Answered, where you can explore nearly every corner of reproductive healthcare in one place. You’ll find practical, plain-language answers about birth control options, abortion access, fertility and family planning, and reproductive rights for teens, parents, and LGBTQ+ people.
If you’re navigating a new diagnosis, wondering about changes to insurance coverage, or just trying to keep up with what’s legal (and where), this page pulls it all together. It’s a space designed for curiosity — not judgment.
You can browse questions like “Can I still get pregnant if I’m on testosterone?”, “Is it too late to get the HPV vaccine?”, or “How could abortion bans affect IVF?” — alongside guides on crisis pregnancy centers and how to advocate for yourself in an exam room.
So if you’re ready to keep learning, I’d encourage you to explore and play around. Whatever your situation, you’ll find something that helps you feel more informed, confident, and in control of your care.
