Do I have to tell my doctor or OB-GYN about past assault?
No — you do not have to tell your doctor or OB-GYN about past sexual assault.
That information is yours, and you are never obligated to share it — not to receive care, not to be believed, and not to be treated with respect.
That said, some survivors choose to share that they’ve experienced sexual trauma because it can help providers to offer informed care that’s more sensitive, slow-paced, and centered on your comfort. But it’s entirely up to you.
Why you might consider sharing (only if you want to):
Telling your provider — even in vague or minimal terms — can help you to:
Set clear boundaries about what you’re okay with
Request modifications to exams or procedures (like going slower, narrating each step, or skipping internal exams)
Give yourself grace in the moment - allowing space for differing reactions like panic, dissociation, or emotional distress during pelvic care
You don’t need to go into detail. You can say something simple like:
“I’ve been through some trauma, and I’d like to move slowly today.”
“I have a history of sexual assault, I’m not sure how my body will react to this exam.”
“Certain parts of exams can be triggering for me — can we talk through what will happen beforehand?”
“I’d like to skip the internal exam for now.”
It’s also totally normal to not want to share.
You may feel like keeping that part of your story private — especially in a clinical setting. That’s valid.
But if you do want to share and you don’t feel safe or comfortable doing so with your provider, that might be a sign that they’re not the right fit for you. Trust matters — and you deserve a provider who makes you feel respected, believed, and in control of your care.
What if the provider doesn’t respond well?
That’s not your fault. If a provider is dismissive, makes you feel uncomfortable, or ignores your boundaries — you are allowed to stop the visit or ask to see someone else. You deserve care that meets you with compassion, not judgment.
If you're searching for someone new, you can ask if they practice trauma-informed care or work with patients who have experienced sexual violence.
Bottom line?
Your story is yours. You don’t owe anyone your past to receive respectful, quality care.
But if disclosing even a little bit helps you feel more in control — that’s a valid choice too.
And either way, you deserve to feel safe and supported in every exam room you walk into.
